Thursday, July 8, 2010

Mark: 1 vs. Children: 1

There are a number of success factors that I consider when determining if I am happy with my race performance. One of them being the question "Did any children beat me?"

I don't know what children do these days, but I'm pretty sure they shouldn't be crossing the finish line before me. A few months ago I ran in a 10k with 2800 other male runners. During the run I was a bit surprised when at mile 3 I encountered a child in front of me. I passed him. And then after feeling pretty proud of myself I passed another child at mile 4. As I wondered if the kid was just one of those guys that grew a beard at age 11, he coughed. A very high-pitched cough. Like his voice hadn't changed what happens when you hit puberty.

After the race, a quick search of the results revealed that I got schooled by three children. Two 13-year olds and a 12-year old. The fastest of them beat me by 1 minute 14 seconds. The score at that point in time was Mark: 0 vs. Children: 1.

This last weekend I ran in my first 10k since getting beat by children. And I stand triumphant before you this day as I declare that I kicked their asses. All of them. Mark: 1 vs. Children: 1. Next race I'm pulling ahead. Watch and learn, children.


  1. My first 5k of the summer I took 4th place. I was beat by two 13 year olds and a 17 year old. I literally have the running experience (26 y.o.) of the two 13 y.o. pip squeaks. WTF?!?!?

  2. I don't want to number the kids that beat me in the 10K that I did last week. But I'm pregnant, that's an excuse, right???

  3. You made me self-conscious when I read this. I think the question for me might be worded more like 'did I manage to beat any children?'. Okay, okay, I admit it - the real question is 'did I manage to beat anyone?'

  4. LOL. I think I got wayyyy too much joy out of beating little boys in a neighborhood 3k I did in May. That was the first race I did post IT band injury.

    I wasn't really an athlete in elementary school. I took ballet. I remember thinking "Ha! Victory is so sweet." Since I'm 24 and they were like 9 and 10. Real cool. Haha.

  5. Your power rant at the end is puh-thetic. HA! I love it :-)

    I just ran my first race longer than a 5K ever. 2 weeks ago, 4-miler, with local running club. I was feeling OK about myself going into the final half-mile (I had already passed a pre-teen girl, thank God), when a 79-yr. man passed me... and he was doing run-walk-run intervals! Granted, I overtook & beat him -- but only by 31 sec. Crap, that was a close one!

    (Come to find out later, another old wheezer had beat me by almost a minute. Another half-mile & I coulda passed him too? Gnarly old dogs!)

  6. I am with ya on little kids beating me, it will not happen again, and if it does, I will not be afraid to pull out the "hamstring" injury scam!